If there is one thing you can do to really, really make me mad, that is interfere with my sleep. That includes you, offspring over the age of two (she says, generously). What I would like is some kind of complete sensory deprivation chamber to hide in between 11 p.m. and 7 a.m. nightly. It would be temperature controlled, soundproof, and dark, and would of course contain my beloved Tempur-pedic pillow. I suppose it would have to have some kind of override switch for emergencies, but woe betide the person who misused it.
After having my slumber disrupted for the past eight years by pregnancy, nursing, babies, kids, dogs, and spouses, I have a huge chip of entitlement on my shoulder. I feel that I am owed a good night’s sleep every single evening for the rest of my life. I don’t think that is unreasonable. Unfortunately, those who share my home and my bed don’t seem to understand this. Doors are left wide open; dog collar tags jingle mercilessly; clothes are retrieved, forgotten, retrieved again; children stop by to mention that they went for a walk and saw a “golden yellow” snake; floorboards squeak and creak. And I lay in bed seething (not very conducive to sleep either).
My birthday is next week. You know what to get me.
{ 15 comments… read them below or add one }
I feel exactly the same way.
Last summer my daughter started sleeping through the night reliably (she was FOUR) and for something like a month I slept over ten hours a night!
Ah-men! Hope all your birthday dreams come true
One bottle of Ambien it is.
OH YES. Sleep! Why is it so difficult to get any? I hope you get your birthday wish, a whole lifetime of his birthday wish.
My birthday was this past weekend and a full night of sleep would have been a wonderful present. It didn’t happen. I hope you have better luck.
Sleeeeeeeep. Cannot compose more coherent response than to say, “moooore sleeeeep,” zombie-like.
I hear you, sister!
Maybe at BlogHer. Do you have a room to yourself? At least the first night?
Sleep, glorious sleep!! I thank my lucky stars and count my blessing every night, since my little one has slept through the night since she was 7 or 8 months old.
Hope you get your birthday wish!
I’ll send you some earplugs?
Right there with ya. Even though I read every single, I swear!, parenting book out there–all of which warned me how exhausted I would be–I didn’t understand what that meant until I lived it. Arrgghh.
I miss those college days with the very very late Saturday sleep ins!
So funny! My husband has kept track of the nights of sleep he’s missed. He’ll be dead before he makes up the difference.
Exactly. Our mistake was getting a king-sized bed. Now everyone thinks they are invited in just because they can fit.
Welcome to my world. I will send you said earplugs and a lock for your door. I would have thought, for me that now my kids are over 4 I would get a good nights sleep. But alas, I still get woken up. Maybe when they leave home I will get a straight 8 hours …….
HAHA! Love this post. I soooo agree with you. I’m evil without sleep. Evil. And I hate getting out of bed in the morning. Hate.
happy almost birthday! i’ll totally get you sleep.