Silly is funny. Subtle is funny. Snarky is funny. Even puns can be funny.
But saying, even as a joke, that adoptive parents are lying alcoholics (and social workers are downright dumb)?
Not funny.
Not ever funny, which is why I don’t understand how Hallmark could print this card, or how anyone would ever buy it (except me. I bought it so I could show you).
Are you kidding me, “tiny little division of Hallmark“? You may be tiny, but this is hugely offensive. And I’m okay with pointed humor. I regularly send someecards.
I wasn’t adopted as a child. I’m not an adoptive parent, although there’s a chance I might be one someday. I’m not a social worker, but I believe them to be, for the most part, extremely caring and hard-working people who do often thankless work. A adoption social worker’s job is to make sure children find safe, loving homes. They ask tough questions because they have to. And because they represent children who don’t have a voice of their own, they deserve to hear the truth–which is what the vast majority of adoptive parents will tell them.
The image on the card also implies that this is a single woman trying to become a parent through adoption. Add another group to those that could and should be horrified by this card.
Tell me if you think I’m making too big of a deal about this. But words matter, and these words are unacceptable.
I did register my disgust with Hallmark, by the way. I sat on this post for awhile waiting for an answer. If one arrives, I’ll let you know.
{ 12 comments… read them below or add one }
Um. Wow.
I refused to serve as a reference for a friend who was adopting internationally – not because I thought she wouldn’t be a wonderful parent (she would be, and she has been for years), but because I hadn’t known her for the minimum amount of time to serve as a reference, as specified by the adoption process. Obviously I take the process pretty seriously.
So to make light of it – “congrats, you foiled the system and got yourself a baby!” – is messed up, in my opinion.
That is so awful that I had to laugh. I laugh at horrible things sometimes. I’m going to hell.
Another one they could add to their line of cards are “Congratulations on your sham Green Card marriage!”
or “Congrats on the baby you’re having in a desperate attempt to save your ill-advised, dysfunctional marriage!”
or “Sorry your dad died. Try to focus on the inheritance windfall.”
Oh my gosh! I’m kind of speechless. I hope they respond. It’s really terrible.
Wow.
And yeah, “sham green card marriage” would be another good one.
Yuck. That’s pretty awful. How about another card for this line – “Sorry you got laid off. You were never very good at that job anyway.”
Still think it’s hard to top the adoption one.
Good for you for calling them on it!
And while they are at it they can make the “Congratulations Graduate – I guess they never figured out that you cheated your way through college”
Not to mention the implication that if you drink, you won’t get to adopt a child? Or that if you do drink too much, you should just lie about it?
I guess I just don’t think adoption is easy to make jokes about. It isn’t funny or silly.
There are people out there scamming the system who should not be parents and are trying to adopt. They are the minority. There are also many, many people (men/women/loving couples of all stripes) who desperately want to become parents and they are trying to adopt too. NEITHER one is a joke or worthy of a card that tries to get a laugh out of the process. You were right to register a complaint.
That’s outrageous!
You’re totally justified in being outraged. That card really is wrong on far too many levels.
Maybe the card is designed for passive-agressive types. “How can possible you say that I don’t support your decision to adopt? I even sent you a *card*”
and by that I mean: “how can you *possibly* say that I don’t support your decision to adopt? I even sent you a *card*”